Getting Ready to Say ‘I Do’
Leaving Brianne behind on Sunday afternoon was one of the hardest things Josh had ever done. They had secretly returned Saturday evening so they could spend time alone at her house. Their lovemaking had never seemed sweeter. He could almost taste the commitment in her kiss – and that was tough to walk away from.
“I wish I could take you and Big back with me,” Josh told her as they waited for his flight to be called at the bustling airport.
“I wouldn’t travel by air with Big. My dog is not excess baggage,” Brianne informed him.
“No, he’s our first-born,” he joked.
“That he is,” she agreed. “Mr. Big Chasez. Has a nice ring to it.”
“Yeah, it does – almost as good as Mrs. Brianne Chasez.” He pulled her close. “I can’t wait.”
“You’ll have to wait a while longer.”
“January one, we got a date to discuss,” he reminded her.
The first time his flight was called, he ignored it. “Tyler will pick up the car in a couple of days. Are you positive you won’t keep it?”
“Absolutely. It was a lovely thought, but I can’t accept it.”
“I only wanted you to be safe, baby.”
“I know you meant well. The answer is still ‘no’.”
“I love you, Brianne.” He kissed her softly as his flight was called again. “Take care of yourself.”
“I will. You take care of yourself, too.”
“I’ll call you.”
”Josh, get going!” she teased.
On more kiss and he headed for the gate. “I’ll call you!” he shouted with a wave. “Love you!”
Brianne stayed until she saw his flight take off, then she returned to the car that was being returned to the Chasez Chicago home. She pulled out her cell phone.
“Daddy, it’s Bree. Can I come and talk to you?”
“Come on over, baby girl,” was Brian Collins’ immediate response.
“I’ll be there in a few minutes. I’m at the airport now.”
Ringing off, she started the vehicle. The large car was a dream to drive – and she’d love to have a shiny new car, but Josh had to learn not to be so extravagant. Anyway, once they were married, it’d be hers. Just thinking about all the things she had to do to give Josh her commitment on Christmas was mind-boggling! And she had this almost irresistible urge to giggle! She certainly hoped Josh wouldn’t be too disappointed to find her as the only gift under the tree on December 25!
“I gave my notice,” Brianne announced to Denise and Colleen as they dug into their customary lunch salads.
“You what?” Denise demanded around a mouthful of Romaine. “A few weeks ago, you were ready to dump his ass!”
“We had long talks over Thanksgiving. We were having a ‘failure to communicate’ or, as how Josh put it, what he said/what she heard’. We had stopped really listening to each other.”
“And a talk took care of it?” Colleen asked.
“No. We opened our minds to the other’s point of view. He’s no angel; don’t get me wrong. He has screwed up, but then so have I.”
“Wow!” Denise was still having trouble fathoming the news. “So when’s the big day?”
“Some time after New Year’s.” Brianne grinned. “He’s getting me for Christmas – so don't let anything slip when he calls – please.”
“So, when he shows up for Christmas all you’re going to be wearing is a smile and a big bow?” Denise laughed.
“Gee, I hadn’t thought of that! What a great idea!”
Colleen and Denise both rolled their eyes Heaven-ward.
“No.” Brianne was adamant. She was not leaving her home and family for Christmas.
“Bree, I perform on New Year’s Eve.”
“So? You’d have plenty of time to get to wherever it is from here.” She had given up Thanksgiving. She would gladly give up New Year’s. But not Christmas. In order for all her plans to work, she needed to be home for Christmas. Her father and Jeff deserved her last holiday as a single woman.
“Baby, I need you in Chicago and Orlando.”
“I need to be here.”
“Baby—“
“No. So far, Josh, I’ve been the one who’s done all the real giving in this relationship. It’s been my time spent traveling wherever you are. You’ve thrown a lot of money and words at it.”
“Bree—“
“All the fancy gifts and flowers don’t make up for the fact you don’t want to be here.”
“That’s not true,” he protested.
“Think about it.” Brianne sighed. “The people in my life are just as important as the people in yours.”
“I never said they weren’t.”
“You didn’t have to.” Rubbing a tired hand over her eyes, she was terribly disappointed in him. She hadn’t thought they could backslide so badly in a few short weeks. Why did he have to do this now? Chicago wasn’t that far. They could be there by Christmas night if he were willing.
The uncomfortable silence stretched over the airwaves. She had no more to say on the subject. He’d have to come to his decision on his own. She was not giving on this point. She waited for him to speak again. When Josh said nothing, she softly said, “Good-bye.”
Josh looked at his cellphone in disbelief. Brianne had hung up on him!
Brianne barely heard the chime of her cellphone over the din of her going-away party. Waving the phone at Denise, she indicated she had to take a call, then stepped into her much quieter office. It had to be Josh; he was the only one who called her on the cell. It had been a week since their disastrous call – this from a man who called daily.
“Hello.”
“I thought I was going to get voicemail,” Josh stated.
“If you want voicemail, I can switch you,” she offered.
“No, I wanted to hear your real voice, baby. I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you, too.”
“Good. I thought you’d still be mad.”
”I wasn’t mad exactly.”
“You said that even when you were mad at me, you still loved me,” he reminded her.
“I do, baby,” she said softly.
“It’s been a hell of a week.”
“It’s been pretty hectic around here, too.” Training her replacement, saying good-bye to the kids, cleaning out her office – it had all stretched her emotions thin. The last thing she had needed was Josh to pull his old demands out. She’d been on emotional tightrope for days – and the doctor’s appointment in two hours loomed large.
“Bree, you there?”
“I’m sorry. Yes, I’m here.”
“I miss you, angel. I need you here.”
“Josh, can we not talk about this right now?” Brianne smiled. She wanted it to be a wonderful Christmas surprise.
“Why not?” he grumbled. She never wanted to talk about their being together anymore. Since Thanksgiving, she had shut down every marriage conversation. He was feeling tired, vulnerable and desperate.
“Josh?”
“You aren’t going to marry me, are you, Brianne?” he demanded suddenly.
His anger startled her. “Josh—“
“You aren’t, are you?” His sigh was heavy and heated. “Why did you accept the damned ring? Just to keep me hanging around?”
“Josh, please—“ Brianne tried to calm him, but he wasn’t listening.
“Hey, I guess, I understand. You wouldn’t have been the first woman who wanted me around for what she could get out of me.”
Now, she was fighting fury. Money had always been an issue with them. How freely he had spent it had made her feel guilty – and now he was accusing her of gold digging? “You listen here, Chasez—“
He let out a nasty laugh. “I have to admit, you were the best at the sex part. You had me believing that I was all you wanted. That innocent crap had me between the legs but good.”
“Joshua!” How could he say those things to her? Brianne’s voice became low and ominous with warning. “You had better stop right there, buddy. You’re getting into mighty dangerous territory.”
“No, baby, you are. I don’t want to play anymore. Since you don’t want to marry me, the gravy train stops here.”
“Gravy train? Why, you bastard!—“ Brianne was appalled. How could he say those awful things to her? Especially now? “How dare you talk to me like that?”
“Oh, I dare. Sex and perks. That’s all I ever was to you.”
“You sound like a spoiled brat who isn’t getting his way.”
“Me? You’re the one who won’t leave ‘Daddy’ and Jeff.”
“Stop it, please, Josh. You’re saying things you’ll regret—“
“What’ll it be, Brianne? Me and all I can give you? Or Daddy and Jeff?”
He had demeaned her love by calling it sex. He had accused her of wanting him for the ‘perks’ – and now he wanted her to chose between him and her loving family? What sort of decision was that to make? The infuriated devil on her left shoulder was gagging the angel on her right. “You’d settle for a woman you claim doesn’t love you?” she taunted.
Josh grunted in self-disgust. “That’s how far I’ve sunk, thanks to you. I never got hung up on drugs or alcohol. Baby, you’re my addiction.”
Now he was ranking her up there with destructive behavior. Was there no end to the insults? “Josh, you need to hang up and call back when you are in a better frame of mind.” This was her last effort to rein him in.
“I want an answer, dammit.”
“I am spending Christmas here in Taylor Ridge with my father and my brother. If you decide to become civil, you are welcome to join us.”
“Wrong answer,” he growled.
“No. Right answer – and if you think you can talk to me this way, I am though with you, Joshua Chasez.” Brianne hit ‘end’. Then she turned off her cellphone.
She slumped into her chair. This couldn’t be happening. Not now. Not today. Taking a deep breath, she forced herself to be calm. Hysteria wouldn’t accomplish a thing. Brianne covered her stomach protectively with her hands – Here was the reason she needed to stay strong. Her child needed her.